


I'M NOT MONICA!!!!

by JD_Steiner



Series: It's Not So Wrong To Be....Shameless !!! [2]
Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: F/F, F/M, M/M, Multi, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-03
Updated: 2019-03-03
Packaged: 2019-11-08 14:41:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,243
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17983040
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JD_Steiner/pseuds/JD_Steiner
Summary: Sometime after Mick's death..............Ian had disappeared, not to be heard from by any other member of the Gallagher household for almost a month; pulling a classic 'Monica' move straight from her playbook.The story picks up when Ian returns home to grab some of the belongings that he has, until now, left in the attic so that his siblings can make use of the empty bed. The family finds out what has been going on with him and wants to interfere with the plans that he has made before returning.**Please note that these fics can be read together or as one-offs. It's just another day on Chicago's south side, in the Gallagher Household.**





	I'M NOT MONICA!!!!

“ Whoa, Whoa, Ian, buddy, you need to calm down, Ok?” Lip held his right hand up in front of himself defensively, palm facing his brother. In his other hand, he had his cellphone to his ear “We need an ambulance please...it's for my brother, Ian Gallagher.” He glanced at Ian again, who was now giving him a dirty look from where he sat, on his bed.  
“Well he's bipolar and we think he's off his meds. He's manic and restless right now, maybe a little paranoid....yes,yes our mother, Monica. Ok, thank you.” Hanging up the phone, he placed it back in his pocket turning back to the room “Ambulance is on the way.”  
“I don't need an ambulance! I need to get out of here!!” Ian pushed himself up off of the bed, grabbing his Jansport backpack that was nearby and dumping the contents onto the bed. Papers, textbooks, a pencil case among other items; came spilling out. One of his brothers had obviously been using it for school.   
“Ian, you can't leave, babe, Lip is right, you need to just take a couple of deep breaths, ok?” Trevor who had stood at the end of the bed stepped up to Ian, putting a hand on his chest before anyone could say anything to warn him.   
The next thing Trevor knew, he was flying backward, across the room, smacking his head and back off of the closed door before falling to the floor.   
“Shit!” Lip cursed loudly, running to see if Trevor was alright.  
“Fuck!” Fiona held a hand to her forehead. She did feel sorry for her little brother but this was getting ridiculous. It was happening more and more now, to the point that it was getting a lot harder to take care of him. Ian was already a stubborn redhead, always had been, so she had learned for the most part, how to deal with him. Now, with him also having been diagnosed with Bipolar like their mother, Monica; and him being taller and a lot stronger than her, it had really become an effort of the whole family. There had already been multiple incidents where someone could have been seriously hurt, possibly even killed (that she wasn't sure of.) When Ian went manic, it triggered a psychosis in him that made his eyes wild and his anger had a hairpin trigger. She knew that this was for his own good.

In Truth, they were all more than a little scared of him.....

“Ian...” she noticed he was breathing hard as he parted the slats of the blinds to peer out the window as the sirens in the distance get closer.  
“WHAT DID YOU DO!!” He turned and screamed at them, his voice angry and defiant “No! No! I have to leave, NOW!” turning, he headed toward the bedroom door and Fiona grabbed his upper arm.   
“Ian, look at me....” Fiona tried again to get his attention, this didn't work either so she raised her voice “IAN CLAYTON GALLAGHER!! LOOK AT ME RIGHT NOW!”  
Ian stopped what he was doing, head spinning around “Yes, Fiona?” his tone somewhat sarcastic as she reached up, grabbing his ears, making him cry out “Ahh! Ow!!” as he bent over so they were face to face.   
Over by the door, Trevor was rubbing the back of his head, smiling he couldn't help but giggle at what Fiona had done, he'd have to remember that for the next time Ian was being a bit of an ass.   
Seeing that Trevor was ok, Lip crossed the room where Fiona and Ian were now fighting.   
“Fuck Fi, Let Go!”  
“Not until you listen to me.”  
Ian's hands were over hers, trying to pry her fingers from his ears. This only made her hang on tighter.   
“I don't have to listen to you, or anyone else!....”  
“You need to let us help you, Ian. Your havin' one of your manic episodes and not actin' like yourself right now. We're right here and we want to help you feel better, we know this is going to pass, they always do, you just have to give it time and you have to trust us, OK?”   
She paused “Yeah? Ian? C'mon...We are all here because we care about you and want to help you, that's all. We want you stable so that you can come back home with us.” Finishing what she had to say, she let go of him now, pressing her forehead to his as they had always done. 

Downstairs, the front door opened and Debbie entered the house as the ambulance pulled up outside. Liam was sitting on the sofa playing video games and ignoring the commotion.  
“Hey Liam, what's going on? Why is there an ambulance outside?”  
“Hey Debs, Ian's upstairs, Fiona says he is sick and needs to go to the hospital.”  
“Ian's here?” Deb asked excitedly, taking off her jacket and throwing it over the back of the sofa. “Is he ok?” Not waiting for an answer, she ran up over the stairs, taking them two at a time as a knock at the door signaled the EMT's wanting in. Pausing the game, Liam got up and let them in, annoyed at Debbie for not waiting and doing it herself.

Debbie knocked softly on the bedroom door “Can I come in?”  
“Yeah.” came Lip's voice from the other side of the door as she threw it open anyway.  
“Ian!!!” She crossed the room to him quickly, throwing her arms around him and he reciprocated. With her head on his chest, she said directly into his ear “Missed you, big brother.”  
“I missed you too.” Ian pulled back “How have you been, Debs? Where's my niece?”  
“I'm doing good, got a sweet welding gig, makin' good bux. Been saving for Frannie and I to get our own place. She's with Derek's mom and sister tonight, I have some school work to catch up on. “  
“Ah, that's a shame, I was hoping to see everyone before...”  
“Before what?”  
The EMT's enter the room, leaving the stretcher out in the hallway, for now, their radio chatter is the only conversation as everyone else has stopped talking.  
“Wait, what's going on here? “   
“Before I leave, Debs. I was supposed to come back here long enough to pack some clothes and say goodbye..but it looks like Fiona had other plans.”   
“Look who it is, Ian!” Fiona spoke up, pointing toward one of two EMT's who had come into the room. Ian recognized her immediately.  
“Hey Gallagher, long time, no see. You missed us that much you had to call us out to your house, did you?” The woman, her reddish brown hair up neatly in a bun as he had remembered, her fair skin freckled much like his own. She smiled at him now as she tried to break the ice. “You coulda just dropped by the station, you know.”  
Ian smiled too “Sue! Wow, it has been a long time, hasn't it?”  
“It has. How are you, Ian?” She approached him now, trying to encourage him to talk. The other EMT, Ian's ex, Caleb stood at the ready by the door for now.  
“Ah, things could be better, just goin' through a rough time.”  
“So you're goin' somewhere huh?”  
“Yeah, I'm leaving. I'm getting out of the south side and away from all of this. I'm gonna go somewhere new.”  
“No, what you did, Ian; was disappearing for days on end only to show back up after us worrying about you. It's obvious you are off your meds and now you're running away.” Fiona countered. I figured that you would eventually show up here and I refuse to let this shit happen in this house anymore!! Things are finally going to get straightened out around here and we are going to get back on top of our game. No more Fucking around.! So either you go and let us help you or we call the cops.”  
Ian turned to Fiona angrily “Really? You're going to try and pull this shit with me? C'mon Fiona.”  
“Running away isn't going to solve your problems. No matter where you go, they will just keep following you until you deal with them.” Sue chimed in, siding with Fiona. This made Ian roll his eyes as he grabbed the backpack again and walked toward the door where Caleb stepped in front of him.   
“C'mon man, I just wanna get my stuff from the attic and get out of here. “  
“Move, Caleb.”  
“Hi to you too.”  
“I'm done being fuckin' nice.” Ian tries to push past Caleb who holds him back with a hand on Ian's chest.  
“Don't fuckin' touch me, Caleb.” Ian gave Caleb the dirtiest look with a hint of animosity as he backed off a few steps, back toward the center of the room.   
“We all care about you Ian, we only want what's best for you.”  
“Really, Caleb? You don't get to say that. If you cared about me, you wouldn't have cheated when we were together!”  
“Oh, fuck it...” Ian whispered to himself, under his breath as he takes a running start, football tackling Caleb, sending them both flying to the ground in the hallway. Everyone rushed to the bedroom door to watch Ian and Caleb out on the floor in the hallway as they wrestled, Ian breaking free, pulling himself up he begins to move away as Caleb grabs Ian's ankle making him trip on the step and just about fall flat on his face with a thud, Debbie adding “That looked like it hurt!” as it appears Ian's head smacks off of the hardwood floor  
A collective “Ooooh” coming from the doorway as they all watched it happen as if in slow motion.   
Downstairs, the back door opened and Kev and V entered the house.  
“Hey Liam, what's up little man?” Kev and Liam fist bump, it had become their greeting.   
“What's going on over here? We heard all the commotion.”V asked as she sat down on the chair facing Liam as there was yet another loud thud from upstairs.  
Liam paused the game and faced V and Kev “Ian came home after disappearing for a while, and he wants to get his stuff. Fiona wants him to go to the hospital because he's acting all weird and he doesn't wanna go.”  
“V, I'm gonna go upstairs, see if they need a hand.” Kev was listening to the commotion as he got up from his seat and moved to the foot of the stairs, only to watch Ian come tumbling down into a heap on the landing. “Oh..Ow..shit..”  
“What the hell? Ian, are you alright, man?”  
“Oh, hey Kev!” Ian takes the hand Kev extended and gets to his feet as everyone else comes down over the stairs, Fiona yelling “Kev! Don't let him leave!!” barely getting the warning out when Ian bolts, making a break for the back door as the front door opens and Carl and Kelly enter the house. Kev bolts after Ian.  
“Hey, Fam! “ Carl greets the others as they all come rushing down over the stairs to follow Kev, their feet like rolling thunder on the wooden staircase.

Out in the kitchen, Kev has tackled Ian to the floor, Ian is trying desperately to get away, crawling on hands and knees as Kev grabs the back of Ian's shirt at the neck; hauling him back down, Ian's elbow connecting with the side of Kev's head.  
'Owwww! Mother-fucker! That hurt!”  
“Let go then!”  
“Don't you get it, we're trying to help you, Ian!”   
“AAAAAAHHH!!” Ian screamed as Kev tried unsuccessfully get ahold of Ian's arms as he somehow managed to wriggle out of the shirt. This is a difficult task considering it involves two tall, built men wrestling each other. Taking a couple of steps he spins around to face everyone, pointing his index finger “HA!!”   
“Damnit!” Kev is now holding Ian's white t-shirt which at this point is soaked in sweat and stinks “Ewwww! Gross!” He tosses the shirt over by the washer.  
Ian grabs the butcher knife from the block on the countertop, holding it, arm outstretched, his hand was shaking.   
“Oh my god! Ian!” Debbie exclaimed, “What the hell?”  
“Don't come any closer!” His wild eyes were filled with tears as he held out his left arm, placing the blade against his wrist as his little sister took a few steps toward him “I'll fuckin' do it, I fuckin' swear Debs.”  
Debbie stopped in her tracks, crying; the tears of desperation coming down her cheeks she sinks to her knees just across the threshold at the edge of the kitchen as she pleads.  
“Please, put the knife down, Ian..... please.” The memory flashed in front of her of their mother Monica; when she had slit her wrists in that same kitchen over Thanksgiving dinner one year. The fear from that day resurfaces and she begins to shake, rocking back and forth, wrapping her arms around herself.  
Trevor steps to the front of the group, kneeling down, he wraps an arm around Debbie's shoulders as she begins to cry harder. “It will be ok Debs.”  
“Ian.” Trevor turned to him now “Dude, you gotta drop the knife, just look at how bad you're scaring your sister...you're scaring all of us.” His voice was shaking, even though he tried to remain steady and be assertive and have at least some control, if not anyone else, then himself. He was usually strong in these situations, finding placements for kids he cared about, but this went way beyond that. He had deeper feelings for Ian, he realized, way deeper. Tears sprung to his eyes, too, heart beating faster than it should, adrenaline pumping, yet here he was, scared shitless. Now in a situation where he usually knew what to do and how to react, his mind had drawn a complete blank for a moment at the realization of his feelings and he froze, just staring at Ian who stood near the kitchen table.

Ian looked at the blade of the knife on his arm, small droplets of blood had formed and were turning the silver of the blade dark red. His vision blurred for a moment, shaking his head he let it clear. Suddenly he could feel his heart beating rapidly in his chest, the sting of the blade on his arm as it was pressed into his flesh with his hand beginning to shake so badly he could barely hold on to the handle, let alone press down. Tears came, running down his face as a wave of emotion hit him, he didn't know whether cry, get angry or both as he stared at the knife in his hand, the way the blade caught the light, the way the blood smeared on the blade as it stung his flesh. It felt like his heart was breaking all over again and being ripped out of his chest before being viciously mauled into even smaller pieces. Right at that moment, the one person he wished could be there right now, that he knew could calm him down was the person that he missed the most; Mickey. His lip began to tremble and he began to shake even worse, head in a haze, his eyes were glazed over with tears as he began to sob. Kev walks up slowly, taking the knife from Ian's hand, before taking a few steps back to a safe distance.

The back door opens quietly, just as Ian realizes, Lip tackles his younger brother, sending him flying forwards, face first on to the kitchen floor at Kev's feet, who immediately takes a few steps back allowing Ian time to turn over so he and Lip were face to face. Ian's nose is bloody, likely from the kitchen floor. It's running down his face and onto his neck and chest.  
Smack came the sting of a hard slap against the left side of his face “Owww! What was that for?”  
“For being a dumbass.”  
“Wha?”  
“For running off and making us worry about you, wonder if you were taking your meds or not, spend hours looking for you, dummy.” he leaned down close and said in a little louder than a whisper in an angry tone “Fuckin' listen to me, Ok? Swallow your fucking god damn pride, man up and accept the help!”  
“Get offa me!” Ian screamed, anger rising inside of him he tried to get up but Lip pushed him back down, pinning him with a knee on Ian's chest as Sue and Caleb rushed over.   
“Kev!” Lip instructed, “Take his legs.”  
“Yep”  
“Ahh! Fuckin', let go of me! Mother-fuckers!”  
“There's the Ian we know.” Lip joked as he smiled.  
“I hate all of you, you all know that, right?” Ian sarcastically joked back.  
“Ok, Ian you are gonna feel a pinch over here on your left side. Just something to help you relax.” As she finished the sentence Sue jabbed him, hard near his hip.”  
“Ow!” he flinches in reaction, this makes Lip giggle “Pussy.”  
“Shut it!”

A short time later, Sue and Caleb bought Ian out of the house on a stretcher, stopping in front of them.   
“He's pretty groggy. We gave him haloperidol” Caleb cautioned “But he is awake. So if there is anything else you want to say to him, now is the time.”  
“Where will you be taking him?”  
“Northwestern Memorial, downtown. They have an excellent inpatient psychiatric program.”  
“Ok, thanks.” Fiona stepped up to the stretcher as Caleb and Sue backed off a bit to let them have a moment.  
'Hey, Ian.” She smiled at him, tears in her eyes “Everythin's gonna be ok, you'll see. Let's just focus right now on getting you better, ok?”   
“You think I'm crazy.” his words were slightly slurred from the meds and he looked really tired.   
“No, not completely crazy!” Fiona joked this made Ian smile “We all love you and we all know what happened to Monica. We just want you better so you can come back home.”  
Visibly upset, Fiona backed off, unable to choke back tears she stood on the sidewalk, a hand to her mouth, upset. V came over and wrapped an arm around Fiona's shoulders and whispered something to her, Ian could see her nodding.   
“Trev...” Ian whispered as Trevor stepped up to him “I'm.. I'm sorry about all of this, that I pushed you and that you had to see all of this. I...” Ian's lower lip began to tremble as he continued “I...I understand I..if after this; you never want to see me again.”  
“No...Ian...I Love You.” Trevor touched Ian's cheek “I'm here for you, Ok?” He leaned down, kissing Ian on the lips “I will come to visit as soon as I can, Ok?” Trevor backed off as Sue and Caleb wheeled him to the ambulance. As they came closer to the ambulance, Ian looked over toward his family, behind them, was Mickey. He wasn't scared, or maybe it was the medication that they had given him; either way, Mickey was standing there, staring at him and he was pretty sure he wasn't a hallucination. The look on Mick's face said it all as they loaded Ian into the ambulance, Sue driving and Caleb in the back with Ian, gave a little wave as they drove off.


End file.
